Funny things

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BB tattoo..

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For B.B. King’s birthday, his wife wanted to give him a special gift. BB already had pretty much everything a person could want: money, fame, happiness. His wife decided to get “BB” tattooed on her butt, a “B” on each butt cheek.
On the birthday night, after eating dinner and cake, she decided to show B.B. her gift. After explaining that her gift was very special, she bent over and pulled her pants down, revealing the tattoo on her butt!

B.B. put on his glasses and a yelled: “Who the Hell is BOB?”

Written on the piece of lined paper: Dear Optimist, Pessimist, and Realist, while you guys were busy arguing about the glass of water, I drank it!. Sincerely, The Opportunist.

Written on a white paper: "Dear Optimist, Pessimist and Realist. While you guys were busy arguing about the glass of water, I drank it! Sincerely, The Opportunist."

Slogan on the T-Shirt: I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.

Hey Jerkoff..

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Hey jerkoff. Your hair trigger car alarm has been going off every 5 minutes, ruining everyones saturday afternoon. I guarantee you, no one wants to steal this piece of shit. Fix your alarm please and thank you. X X The people of New York. Turn you Fucking Alarm OFF!!!